Trevor Hayley


Funeral and Life Memorial Celebrant

A Caring Presence for you and your family so you can Celebrate a Life

Servicing Greater Adelaide, Fleurieu, South Coast and Adelaide Hills Regions of South Australia



‘Yes, maybe I can’ Silence

Is there anybody out there? #30

This blog continues on the series ‘Is there anybody out there?” Feel free to read the previous chapters here

You have been neighbours for twenty years. You noticed something was up, and you had plucked up the courage to go and visit your neighbour Molly. Patrick had taken the plunge, and in a very quite and humble way, he asked Molly out, and she had said ‘yes.’ It was a beautiful moment. The ‘date’ had been and gone, and you were both back down at the cafe.

You brought to mind how you were going to handle the session if there was another with Molly. You really wanted to know all the details, but thought Molly may not want to share too much. As you brought the coffees back, you noticed Molly was texting on her phone. When she saw you come, she put it away.

‘These things can be so obtrusive at times’ said Molly. ‘That is one thing I have always noticed about you. You never seem to look at yours.’

‘I suppose you deserve my undivided attention, Molly. The last thing we would want is it to go off, when are in the middle of conversation.’

‘There has certainly been plenty of those moments.’

Molly seemed distracted to you, but as she sipped her coffee, she became more focussed ‘I suppose you want to know how the other night went…….with Patrick.’

‘Well, I did not want to pry Molly. After all it is a moment for you and Patrick. I suppose, I was just happy for you.’

You sipped your coffee and kept Molly’s gaze ‘I will not push you, Molly. What you share is totally up to you. The main thing I suppose is how you felt being with someone else.’

The ‘someone else’ comment seemed to hang for a while. It took time for Molly to respond.

‘Wow, you get right to it’ said Molly ‘I would not have been able to answer that a couple of weeks back.’

‘I am sorry………’ you started.

‘It is Ok, it is only because of the time we have shared, I feel comfortable sharing with you.’

You relaxed a little.

‘It felt Ok. It really did feel OK.’ as Molly sipped her coffee

‘I suppose I was ready, given our conversation leading up to it. I was not going into the date……….’

Molly paused for a moment ‘Yes the date, who would have thought I would ever go on one of those again. I was not going into it cold, unknowing of how it would go. I felt prepared.’

‘What about your husband?’ you asked tentatively.

‘He was there as well. We were able to walk down familiar streets, and I remember those moments with fondness. It felt like the part of me, where he still is was content, even smiling.’

‘When Patrick took my hand, it felt like a shot of electricity shot through my whole body. I immediately thought of hubby┬á who would do the same. I would intertwine my fingers with his.’

‘Wow, holding hands’ you were thinking, but you kept your face neutral.

‘And as I thought this, I felt natural to do the same with Patrick. And so I did. It was a bit of a moment for both of us I was thinking.’

‘What a beautiful thing Molly. Beautiful indeed.’

Molly smiled ‘Patrick mentioned he had not held hands like that since he used to with his wife. Nothing more needed to be said. I could tell he was reflecting as well.’

‘It sounded like you were both comfortable.’

‘Yes, I think we really were. There was awkwardness at the start, but the hand holding was needed to break the ice.’

‘I am really happy for you Molly. It sounds like a great night.’

‘Yes, I am feeling a little giddy. Although it is not “love” as such, it kind of feels like the start. Much like all those years ago with my husband.’

She thought for a while, and smiled ‘Yes much like that.’

Molly added ‘and yes I am sure you would like to know. No we did not kiss. I don’t think either of us were quite ready for that, but that is OK. Gently does it, for now.’

‘Thank you for saying Molly. Yes I was wondering, but I also know it is a private matter between the two of you.’

‘We are going out again tomorrow evening, so we will see what happens.’

As you looked at Molly, you were amazed at how far she had come. Only a week ago she was terrified, but now she seemed at ease. The story was unfolding, before your eyes.

This commentary in this blog is intended to be general in nature. It is just some observations from one fellow traveller in life to another. If anything in this blog raises issues for you, please call Lifeline on 13 11 14 or consult with a trusted medical professional.

Photo by Jen Theodore on Unsplash



Trevor Hayley
Servicing Greater Adelaide and Regional South Australia

Phone: 0409 107 372


ABN 73 737 609 724

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